MY FAVORITE NUTZOIDS: Kenneth Eng!

Here we go again!

This is the second entry in a new series here at Popular Opinions called My Favorite Nutzoids where I will be covering the goofballs, wackos and weirdies that make the internet such a wonderful place. If you missed the first one on famed psychic gas bag Sylvia Browne, you can find it HERE.

Kenneth Eng - NUTZOID!

The party continues with a doozy of a lug-nut in Kenneth Eng. A fellow former NYUnicorn, Eng left the school a few years ago citing ‘racism’ which is odd as he, by all accounts, isn’t a slam poet. Eng then rose to national attention in 2007 when, in a local newspaper out in San Francisco (roughly translated: Saint Frank) he published an article called “Why I Hate Blacks.” Along with being an awful writer, Kenneth revealed himself to be a racist. With Popular Opinions taking a very bold anti-racism stance*, I’m happy to report that there’s plenty more to ostracize this bungler about that makes his being a huge bigot seem almost charming.

Here’s a clip of him being outclassed by well hung Fox News eye-candy John “Big Meat” Gibson:

I love how at 1:40 when Eng states cyborg dragons logically follow evolution which allows them to wield metal, Gibson says “Right” as if to say “of course, we agree on this much.”

This incident is where most profiles of the man begin and end. People get an email, do a youtube search, laugh, and then return to their everyday lives. Luckily, the goober captured my heart to the point where I couldn’t just let him go. Thus, I give you the definitive rundown on this bonehead.

Clearly this is the work of a perfectly sane, well-adjusted individual.

Most recent goings on with the man can be found at the internet’s most valuable reliable resource Encyclopedia Dramatica. There you will find convincing proof that he is not only a racist and an awful writer, but a furry and a no-good-nick with some temper-centric anger-related issues.

BUT HERE IS THE POPULAR OPINIONS EXCLUSIVE!

Since Eng was once a part of the NYUterus, I have tremendous access to firsthand accounts of his zany hijinks. In an anonymous letter sent to my Facebook account, here is the REAL reason Eng had to leave NYU. This isn’t me being ‘silly Chaz,’ I have every reason to believe that this story is real:

“By the time Ken was a Junior, he seemed clearly disturbed. Any criticism coming from teachers would immediately be refuted, since Kenneth preached that his only teacher came from within his soul. [his teacher] made a little note about his 300 page script on dragon riders/warriors, and Ken flipped out on him in front of the class.

It was either Junior or Senior year that Kenneth got waitlisted for a class he was really excited about. As a result, Kenneth called Film & TV dean [Mr. Dean], at 4 in the morning, and told him he would rape and kill his daughter. He continued to call through the night and day, until cops traced the line back to Ken. In an act of diplomacy, Kenneth chose to resign (or quit school) before he got kicked out. No charges were pressed (other than a restraining order from [Mr. Dean]’s whole family). Then he started working for that Asian American newspaper on the westcoast and the rest, i guess, is history.

His name arose in class after Cho seung Hui’s rampage after [his teacher] was struck by the similarities.”

So there you have it! Kenneth Eng is a Nutzoid!

Until next time… Let’s Agree to Agree!

*Always hated it, I can recall moments from my youth when the older cool kids would roll up on their big wheels and say ‘Hey Chaz, want to come be racist?’ to which I responded ‘No man, racism is wack and you gotta attack the wack. Ya dig?’

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4 Comments on “MY FAVORITE NUTZOIDS: Kenneth Eng!”

  1. Sam Says:

    KE: “You probably wanna know why I call myself the God of the Universe as well.”

    JG: “No, I wasn’t gonna ask you about that…why do you hate white people?”

    HA! What a turd.

  2. Reggie Says:

    Had dragons bested knights during the Great Dragon Wars of the Middle Ages, then dragons today absolutely would be grasping kitchen utensils and cell phones. I don’t suppose you dragon bigots will ever open yourselves up to that possibility.

  3. Jed Says:

    I’d love to see him have a discussion with @MichaelJordan about dragons.

  4. Syntax Says:

    You know, I never thought of it like that… Cyborg Dragons from the Middle ages, yes…


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